jeudi 22 octobre 2009

FAA is here to help!

Addiction is something usually associated with drugs. Common and socially accepted addictions include tobacco and alcohol addiction. Funeral addiction is, however, also an addiction becoming more and more widespread in today's society.

Funeral addiction is described as a need to constantly attend funerals, wearing the appropriate clothing or attire (frequently referred to as funeral chic). Funeral addicts are often known to search the internet, daily local newspapers and other sources for information on the latest deaths in town. They often call up local radio stations to learn of the latest fatalities. The funeral addict then attends as many of these funerals as possible. Funeral addicts are believed to attend up to 50 funerals per week as the addiction grows. His increasing dependence forces him to travel to other towns, and even sometimes other countries, to feed his addiction.

The funeral addict usually has another associated addiction. This addiction is fashion related, and involves the addict wearing black clothes continously (funeral chic), in the hope that maybe he might stumble across a funeral.

Like with many other addictions, the addict is usually blind to his increasing dependency. He does not realise the depth of his problem, or sometimes he is even unable to recognise that he has a problem. Luckily, this addiction is becoming more and more recognised by society and help is now provided in the form of FAA - Funeral Addicts Anonymous. FAA's main aim is to help the addict to overcome his obsession with death, attending funerals, and wearing funeral chic. FAA knows how serious funeral addiction can be. As with many other dependencies, funeral addiction continually worsens, eventually spiralling out of control and, if left untreated, may ironically result in death.

The most famous funeral addict is nicknamed The Funeral (real name: The Baby Duke). He is in the process of attending FAA and is slowly overcoming his addiction. Says The Funeral in a recent interview, "Yeah, I stepped the line habitually there for a while, funeral-wise..but like ya know yourself man, it gets fairly tromchuiseach and you have to knock it up a notch. I saw a coffin and it got dark.." Although he became aware of the depth of his problem, with the support of his friend Shhifty, he still insists on wearing funeral chic on a night out, much to the amusement of his friends (The Core 4). Of this funeral chic he says, "That's how I roll been blatantly honest." The Funeral's addiction was originally FABRICated (!) on a trip to London (TATTIL or FACL for 2F2F).